Basically this is a place for me (and some of my more discerning friends, if I can recruit them) to bitch about the songs, bands, and albums that we consider bad music.
So let's get to it.
Today I want to talk about the Klaxons.
The Klaxons are hipsters who dress in neon spandex, play music that sounds sort of like a tetris soundtrack, and are allegedly at the forefront of a musical movement called "New Rave". They are your least favorite things from the 80s and your least favorite things from the 90s, in one convenient day-glo package.
Their single, "Golden Skans", is played way too often on alternative radio, and it gets stuck in your head, but not in a good way. People constantly defend shitty music by saying that it is "catchy". Now, I am not a rockist snob. I like pop music. But there is a difference between a well-written song that you can't stop singing and a song with approximately ten different words in it and a whole lot of "doot doot" bullshit that burrows into your brain and sucks the joy out of you like a leech sucking blood.
It is fitting that their name comes from the word for warning sirens (thanks, Wikipedia!), because I think these dudes are messengers sent back in time from 2015 to warn us about shitty music to come. Their album is called Myths of the Near Future! Think about it! (Yes, I realize that is actually the title of a collection of science fiction stories. I didn't even need Wikipedia for that one.)
In short, please don't encourage them. Don't buy their record, don't buy glowsticks, don't wear multicolored hoodies, just don't do anything that might convince any more music journalists that "New Rave" is a legitimate genre.
2 comments:
omg but i already own like THREE brightly coloured hoodies and sweateshirts. i'm also a certified hipster. this hurts deep in my soul because i also like the klaxons.
i love em
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